The Very British Joy Of The Greasy Spoon

In the Ricky Gervais/Steve Merchant sitcom Extras, there’s a moment where main character Andy is sitting at home, calls his mate Maggie, asks her what she’s up to (flicking through the phonebook seeing what her name ‘could’ve been’) and then suggests lunch in the form of a simple question; ‘greasy spoon?’

Of course Maggie accepts this offer because even though she lacks social skills at every other turn, she’s not dumb enough to turn down that offer.

For the uninitiated, a British greasy spoon, also known a transport cafe, is a no frills eatery where portions are large, bills are cheap and bottles of sauce are passed from table to table. Usually serving breakfast and lunch, greasy spoons make ample use of microwaves, tinned baked beans and over-sized sandwich presses.

Egg & chips and bacon, eggs & beans at Mr G’s Cafe, London.

They are a lovely and often overlooked part of the British cuisine that everyone who visits the isles must make time for and I’ll tell you for why;

Breakfast

After three months of travelling through continental Europe I was so excited to visit a greasy spoon that it was literally the first thing I did in London. There’s a reason hotels offer a ‘continental breakfast’ and a ‘hot breakfast’ for just a little bit extra. With a few exceptions, Europe can be scarce for substantial breakfast options but in the UK a greasy spoon is going to make sure you’re so sufficiently stuffed that you need to roll out the door for a 10am nap.

Reliability

For better or worse, you know exactly what you’re getting with a greasy spoon. Your plate is going to be full, the coffee is going to be average and your stomach is going to have to prepare itself for a bit of oil. Because what greasy spoons offer is so universal and simple it’s pretty hard for the staff to stuff it up.

Me deciding I would be greasier than the food at Peter’s Cafe, ranked #418 of 21655 restaurants in London

They’re Cheap

Even in an expensive city like London a full English with tea or coffee should only set you back 7.50 pounds (~$15AUD). Eat yourself a big plate of bacon, eggs, sausage, beans, tomato, hash browns, mushrooms and toast at 11am and you’ll be good right through to dinner.

Come One, Come All

Even the brits who enjoy the finer things in life still love to indulge in a greasy spoon. Sure, you’ll find lorry drivers and brickies who eat a full English every day but you’re just as likely to find some clean shirt with a name like Claude or Piers popping in for a nostalgic treat. In a country with such openly displayed class system, greasy spoons somehow manage to be a multi-class venue, possibly because no matter where on the socio-economic spectrum you sit, it’s hard to refuse such a patriotic bargain.

So next time you’re in the UK, punch greasy spoon into Google maps and head down to the one closest to you, guaranteed it will be worth the inevitably short trip.

This greasy spoon featured on a well known British TV show and will now feature on our upcoming project. No spoilers for now.